Weak Thesis Statements

1.I’m going to write about Darwin’s concerns with evolution in The Origin of the Species.

-Or-

Darwin’s concern with survival of the fittest in The Origin of the Species leads him to neglect a potentially conflicting aspect of his theory of evolution-survival as a matter of interdependence.

A is the weak thesis statement because it does not make a claim.

2. An important part of one’s college education is learning to better understand others’ points of view.

-Or-

Although an important part of one’s college education is learning to better understand others’ points of view a persistent danger is that the students will simply be required to substitute the teacher’s answers for the ones they grew up uncritically believing.

A is the weaker thesis statement because it is too broad. B not only leads to what college is about, but also what it isn’t about.

3. By inventing terms, such as “loose fit” and “relaxed fit”, the jean industry has attempted to normalize, even glorify, its product for an older and fatter generation.

-or-

The jeans industry targets its advertisements to appeal to young adults.

B is the weaker thesis because it is too broad. BUT! I feel that A is going too in depth and the sentence would be better used in a support paragraph.

4. Othello is a play about love and jealousy.

-or-

Although Othello appears to attack jealousy, it also supports the skepticism of the jealous characters over the naïvete of the lovers.

A is weaker because it states what everyone already, or should already, know.

5. The songs of the punk rock group Minor Threat relate to the Feelings of individuals who dare to be different. Their songs are just composed of pure emotion. Pure emotion is very important in music, because it serves as a vehicle to convey the important message of individuality. Minor Threat’s songs are meaningful to me because I can identify with them.
-or-
The punk rock group Minor Threat uses emotional lyrics to appeal to their target audience, which considers itself individualistic and therefore the lyrics must convey a message of individuality.

A is weaker because it is going way too in depth. It not only gives the thesis statement but also begins splaying support for it.



Why are Offred’s visions of Luke important?

Offred’s visions of Luke are important to the theme of the book because they show what a strong and independent woman she is. While her visions show that she clearly longs for his companionship, she is not waiting for his rescue. She imagines different outcomes for Luke, most of which are not happy. But in none of these visions does she envision him coming back to save her.

This is a strong thesis because it is easily argued since the visions are left for interpretation. On the other hand I am able to use the text in order to explain what I mean. It is also fairly specific as it addresses a single instance in the book.